In the past five minutes

I have heard outside my window:

1 person singing "Everybody Dance Now" (that Jock Jams song)

1 person playing the intro to Oasis's "Wonderwall" on acoustic guitar

1 guy saying "Don't you hate those girls who think they are the shit...You know, the ones who are like 'Chicka Chicka chicka Pow O my god'...I'm gonna go fucking shit (...) Lionel Richie is a white git"

1 very loud belch

(followed by)

(at least) 1 person booting (there was such a noise of vomit hitting the ground that I'm not sure it could have been just one person)

2 people singing the Rangers Football Club chant very loudly

1 guy shouting (in a thick, drunken Scottish accent) "We should fuck."

(followed by)

1 other guy shouting repeatedly (in a similar accent) "Who do you think you are? Who do you think you are?"

1 British siren (which sound much more charming than ours, obviously)

(at least) 3 girls giggling nervously.


And it's Tuesday night.


Delightful.